Psychology as Technology
for Self Development
Do you experience discomfort and low on confidence when talking to girls? Pay too much attention to what they think about you and overly stressed during the dialogue? Become timid and lose spontaneousness and creativity failing the next dating day? Afraid of approaching to women in public places? However, you desperately want to excell in this sphere, but the pick-up classes which you visited lately didn't work. On the other hand, you are envious of your friends who get laid with the next girl, thinking what is wrong with you. If you recognized some of the things mentioned above, then you have problems in communication with opposite gender. It can also be the case when this sphere is affected , when you have a general sociophobia, anxiety and depression . In that case, you also have to solve those problems.
Formation of fear of women.
Although, each case is specific, there are general common reasons why this problem happens. The majority of previous patients which had these problem revealed the following things as the causal factors:
Generally for men, the relationship with all women is related to experiences with the first woman in their life: mother or sister (usually older). It is often the case, if you grew up in a family with strict authoritative mother or sister, and were taught to not show any kind of anger or agression feelings towards them, it can lead to repressed aggression. The agression which is not expressed and kept in, is causing a projection mechanism, and this aggression is changing its sign and for individual it seems like it is coming from the outside. Not only can it cause communication problems with opposite gender, but lead to general sociophobia.
Inability, taboo to express sexuality, shame of sympathy.
It is often the case when kids grow up and in the age of psychosexual development, these period can be accompanied by excessive feelings of shame. Later on, it can develop into a problem with expressing one's sexuality, emotions of shame & guilt manifest when you try to express sexual sympathy : for example to smile to unfamiliar girl can be accompanied by discomforts.
By determining the subconscious conflict material you can easily reprogram and enjoy a healthy ,confident and spontaneouss communication with women. These can be done by a NLP techniques (see NLP). Alternatively hypnoanalysis (see Self-hypnosys) and IFS therapy . Body oriented therapy , can be accompanied with these methods for succesful results. It will reduce the resistance power, and let us to work with subconscious material , more comfortably. You just have to express the represssed aggression and cancel the taboo to express natural sexuality.